Part 103: Fixed Destiny
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content warning: suicide mention
BGM: Powerless
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The glow of the morning sun wakes me up. I never would have guessed that light could sting the body this bad. Myths portray sunlight as a force that can roast humans alive. Now I understand where those ideas came from. Not that I feel any discomfort. Life and pain walk hand in hand. I have yet to experience the latter, but I truly believe that to be the case.
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Leo hisses at me before scurrying off somewhere. Quite the odd attitude for a cat that was once rather fond of me. Well, this won't do. I should take a moment to calm down. I have become Shishimai Rinka. I am present in her home. Thus, that cat cannot be Leo.
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A uniform is required at her school, as I recall. Relying on faint memories, I attempt to locate my own. Other preparations are required before leaving, but those seem to come naturally. I suppose these can be explained away as habits. I take a look at my new self in the mirror. Shishimai Rinka's eyes were once blazing rubies, but now my lovely amethyst eyes have taken their place. Fancy as they may be, I doubt many people will take notice. Well, all will work out just fine.
These are my real eyes, after all.
...
BGM: At Amecha Girls' University High School
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07/16 (MON), Morning
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Oh, bother. Who could have thought that my eyes would so quickly become the primary topic of conversation? This calls for but one course of action. I shall play the fool.
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This simply won't do. My life as Shishimai Rinka has only just begun. The adorable girl panicking before me is Hitsuji Naomi. My junior one year below me, and someone with whom I seem to have a very good relationship. Perhaps it would be best to imitate the style of speech she's accustomed to. Let's see... Shishimai Rinka spoke like this, as I recall.
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My adaptation seems to have worked. She has given up on trying to make sense of things. But as for her current question... I was rather forceful in my means, so I'm not quite used to accessing Rinka's memories yet. After a pause, I finally find a somewhat useful excuse.
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I'm getting the hang of how to talk like her. Displaying around one-third of my emotions seems to do the trick. Rinka is not one for books, judging by Naomi's reaction. Quite unlike my actual self. It's taking some effort to conceal my glee. What sorts of books await me within, I wonder.
07/16 (MON), Noon
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The library is a facility within the school where students can borrow all manner of literature, it would seem. The word itself implies as much. A librarian is present despite it being a holiday, too. What an admirable sort. Naomi returns her book first and then sets off to find a new one.
Half an hour later, we seat ourselves at one of the public tables.
BGM: Naomi
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Naomi sounds vaguely surprised. Alas, my grasp of the concept of time requires further polish.
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I once disliked his works, but they speak to me more now. My current interests may be suspect, but all I must do is make them seem like a natural growth. Keeping one's desires at bay is detrimental to both body and soul.
We spend time making small talk following that. The concept of small talk befuddled me before now. But engaging in it with Naomi has proven quite the fruitful experience. All we do is discuss minor trivialities from our lives and the like. Now I understand how most people interact. I must say, though... being able to enjoy conversation without it being at the expense of others is lovely.
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Naomi attempts to address me, her expression ever so meek. Meek is a rather funny word, isn't it? Perhaps I should try my hand at such an expression. A meek goddess- quite the juxtaposition. Well, former goddess.
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What a lovely girl she is. She must have been quite fond of Numeral II. Ah, my mistake. I should refrain from referring to her as such in my current state. Miharu took her own life on May 3rd in this world. Over two months have passed, and yet their grief has not. Of course, I would never make such an observation aloud. I happen to know precisely how Shishimai Rinka would respond to this. Hehe.
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Her eyes are twinkling with joy. She was able to overcome her own grief quicker than the other two due to knowing Miharu less, I presume. Forcing those who suffer from grief outdoors is an important skill in its own right, I must say. This is a phrase my grandmother apparently would say often.
Having checked out a book, I finally return home. It seems that my eyes will prove to be no issue so long as I act as though all is normal. The issue comes from within. Quite a nice saying. I'm doing rather well, if I do say so myself.
...and then fade to credits. There is, of course, still a post credits scene....
BGM: Amusement Park (Bright Night)
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07/27 (FRI), Night
Today we make our way to the theme park. And on my birthday, no less. What a lovely turn of events. Needless to say, the three of us enjoy a fantastic time together.
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Despite their words, melancholy hangs heavy in the air. Not that I blame them. They must be thinking of Miharu. Some days have passed since I first accessed Rinka's memories. Miharu's importance to the group has become as clear as day to me.
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My grasp on her manner of speaking has come quite far. It seems that leaving a brief pause between sentences makes things sound more sincere.
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That feels like the most appropriate thing to say here. I make sure to maintain eye contact with them both as I talk.
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Mao poses a sudden question. One I fail to understand, which leads me to panic. I try to find the best way to answer it, but Mao soon relieves me of that task.
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This is how I get to spend my seventeenth birthday... Now then, all that's left is to watch the parade.
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BGM: Fall Into...
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It doesn't take long for it to make the news. Oguma Mao finds herself unable to return home. The damage dealt to her heart is too much.
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The news is reported as follows. An accident took place at Stardust Kingdom, a theme park popular with all demographics. A float collapsed during its popular night parade, crushing a spectator. The float had a number of illuminations incorporated into it, causing it to burst into flames upon its collapse. The victim, a mere high school student, burned to death as a result. The student's name was Shishimai Rinka. In a tragic twist of fate, she had come to the theme park with her friends to celebrate her 17th birthday.
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Mao can do nothing but cry. Something felt off about Rinka, but that doesn't matter anymore. How could it, now that she's gone? Her future was stolen from her.
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Mao lets her emotions run wild in the station that night. But her cries go largely ignored by everyone around her.
[BAD ENDING 4: FIXED DESTINY]